Academy Affairs
by Felix Catharsis
Summary: Naruto has a thing for older men. That includes his incredibly hot Algebra teacher, Uchiha Sasuke.
1. Pythagorean?

Academy Affairs  
by dripdrop

**Intro note:**  
Oh shit – more cliché madness? Haha. Well, the pairing is sasunaru for this chapter, and it's unbetaed. There'll be more pairings later on.

- - - - »

Stab, kill, punch, smack, skewer, fry. Sasuke seemed eager to do any of the previously listed actions (except for fry, maybe) when Naruto's head and eyes and posture began to droop. Again.

Whoever banned teachers from beating sense into their students was an idiot.

"Uzumaki," Sasuke growled, whipping his pointer out and slamming it onto his desk. Naruto sat upright immediately.

"Is class over?" he asked sleepily. Around him, classmates began to snicker behind their hands, careful not to attract Sasuke's attention. They were aware of his temper when it came to disruptions and the like.

"This is the eleventh time this week, Uzumaki," Sasuke snapped. He pointed towards the overhead projector and demanded, "have you learned anything at all?"

Naruto made a show of looking confused, scratching his head and looking pensive as he racked his brain for nonexistent information. "The Pythagorean theorem?"

Sasuke remained livid. "We learned that three weeks ago."

"Oh yeah."

Sasuke threw his hands into the air, dropping his beloved pointer and shuffling over to his chair to deflate into it. "I'm seriously considering a vacation right now," he grumbled. Naruto looked apologetic and slightly offended as he stood from his seat.

"Ah – Sensei, I was kidding! We learned about the – " he looked to Shikamaru for help and he mouthed 'point-slope formula' to him, "A-about the point-slope formula this week!"

Sasuke quirked a brow, having missed the silent conversation his two students shared moments before. "Oh really?" he questioned, rising from his spot. "Care to demonstrate how to correctly use the formula for the class, then?"

"Uh… no?"

Sasuke ignored him, handing over a marker and gesturing towards the board. Naruto caught his daring smirk as he strode forward, trying his best not to combust on the spot.

Once he was close enough to spot the obstinate specks of older formulas still on the smooth surface, he gulped, and raised the marker until it hovered crookedly above an open space.

"Go on," Sasuke urged patiently.

"Yeah, yeah," Naruto grumbled. He frowned as he pressed the marker onto the board and began to write. Sasuke chuckled inwardly, surprised that Naruto was attempting to make up something.

His chuckling stopped abruptly when he realized Naruto had finished, presenting a pornographic drawing of two figures tangled in a mass of limbs. He noted with dark amusement that both figures were decidedly male.

"D'you like it Uchiha-sensei?" Naruto asked. "It's you and Sai-sensei."

Sasuke desperately wanted to kick something as he recalled the student-engendered rumor about his affair with Sai, one of Konoha Academy's Art teachers. The class laughed openly as he stormed towards the board and wiped the drawing off with his palm.

"That was not the Pythagorean theorem," Sasuke said.

"I thought I was supposed to be demonstrating the point-slope form, Uchiha-sensei?" Naruto asked. He grinned triumphantly when Sasuke blanked out, realizing his obvious mistake.

"You're right. Then go ahead and finish your demonstration, Uzuma– "

His reply went unheard as the bell rang, dismissing students from the room. Several boys whooped and patted Naruto on the shoulder as they passed, congratulating him on something no one else would ever dare to do (in Sasuke's class, at least). Naruto bowed cheekily in reply.

Once the room was significantly empty, Naruto finally moved towards his desk and gathered up his belongings. As he shoveled stubby erasers and bite-marked pencils into his backpack, Sasuke relaxed once again in his chair.

"I_have_ learned a lot this semester, Sensei," the blonde confessed as he shouldered his brightly colored bag. "Just not completely _relevant_material," he added.

Sasuke snorted. "Our private lessons aren't completely relevant?" he asked. Naruto laughed.

"If they really were for my educational benefit, _then_ they'd be absolutely relevant," he explained, moving forward so he could plant his hands on either side of Sasuke's desk.

"Who says what we do isn't educationally beneficial?"

Naruto shrugged, contemplating, and Sasuke pulled him forward until the proximity between their faces was close enough for discomfort. Naruto grinned, hardly discomforted at all.

"You have to stop falling asleep in my class, Naruto," Sasuke whispered into his ear, curling fingers into his hair. Naruto chuckled.

"If I wasn't so tired after our tutoring sessions everyday, then that might be possible," he replied. Sasuke smirked and nipped his earlobe.

"I found your art particularly amusing today," he said between bites along Naruto's jaw. Naruto smiled as his pulse quickened.

"Serves you right for putting me on the spot," he retorted, laughter rumbling in his chest. Sasuke smirked and smoothed pale hands under his shirt and over his muscled chest, passing over slightly peaked nipples. Naruto's breathing hitched as he did so.

"Bastard, I'm gonna be late for class," Naruto gasped half-heartedly as he eyed the clock. Sasuke kissed the side of his mouth and undid his tie.

"I can write a note," he answered. He ignored Naruto's protest as he pulled him into another kiss, dragging his tongue across the blonde's lips until they parted, allowing entrance. Naruto groaned huskily as Sasuke's tongue met his, battling wetly as Sasuke yanked Naruto into his lap.

The late bell chose to ring again at that moment, announcing that all students should be in their second period class.

"Shit!" Naruto cried, jumping out of Sasuke's embrace and picking up his bag from the floor. "I'm late again!"

Sasuke failed to restrain his smirk as he reached for the post-its on his desk and began to write an excusing note. Naruto waited anxiously as he wrote, running nervous hands through his spiky blonde hair.

"Here," Sasuke said once he was finished, handing Naruto a hastily written note explaining his short absence. "Hopefully Gai won't make you do seven-hundred push-ups today."

"Yeah, six hundred and ninety-nine is much better," Naruto grumbled. He turned to leave hastily, pausing before the doorway when Sasuke stood from his desk.

"See you later, Sensei," he said with a wave. Sasuke smirked, knowing that someone was close enough in hearing range that Naruto had to address him properly.

"Later, Uzumaki." he replied. Naruto grinned one last time before darting away, obviously worried about Gai's tardy punishment he'd have to endure later.

- - - - »

**End note:**  
I blame writer's block for this. Sasuke is out of character (sorta) and the plot is really shitty. I'll probably throw Neji in here at one point. Hahaha.

Feedback is_ always_ appreciated. :D


	2. Hyuuga Neji

Academy Affairs  
by dripdrop

**Intro Note:**  
So this is chapter two. I'm sorry about the delay. But I truly appreciated all the feedback I received. Thank you to everyone who reviewed!

- - - - »

The day after Gai's severe tardy punishment, Naruto was sore all over. He limped to school determined to not speak to Sasuke for the rest of the day (he blamed Sasuke for making him late), and was in a fine mood until lunch time rolled around, when Ino just _had_ to open her big mouth.

"Hey, have you guys seen the new Physics teacher?" she squealed at once they'd all set their trays down, leaping from her seat to wave her arms excitedly. When no one demanded with fervent urgency who the new Physics teacher was, Ino promptly sat back down, upset with the lack of attention her gossip received. Across the table, Naruto spotted Shikamaru's eye roll and laughed.

"We don't care about the new teacher, Ino," Chouji offered through a mouth stuffed with food.

"Yeah," Shikamaru added in. "He's probably just another jerk, like Uchiha."

"Sasuke-sensei is not a jerk!" Ino and Sakura shouted immediately, slamming simultaneous fists onto the table in disagreement. Shikamaru shrugged in response, not bothering to rebut.

"But anyways," Ino continued, convinced that she held everyone's attention now, "the new teacher is incredibly gorgeous – his hair is so long – "

"Probably a hippie," Naruto joked. He cried out when Sakura bopped him on the head.

" – and his eyes are this milky-lilac sort of color – "

"Because he's blind," Shikamaru grumbled. He only grunted in annoyance when Ino smacked him on the arm (hard).

" – and his voice could just melt me into a puddle!"

"Alright, enough!" Chouji said once Ino looked as if she were about to 'melt into a puddle' right then and there. Shikamaru and Naruto nodded in agreement to Chouji's proclamation, growing tired of Ino and Sakura's high-pitched squeals.

"What's his name?" Shikamaru asked once Ino had settled down, though his voice showed his disinterest to really know of such a thing.

"Hyuuga-sensei, I think," Ino answered. She opened her mouth to speak some more, but Naruto's sudden spasm of a reaction caught everyone's attention, and they watched as he hacked his lunch food into his fist.

"Naruto?" Sakura asked, concerned. Naruto waved a hand as if to prove that he was fine, and the loud coughing at the mention of Hyuuga-sensei's name was nothing to worry about at all.

The lunch bell rang then, signaling the group of friends to dump their leftover food and walk to their classes – but not before asking Naruto if he was alright (sane) and slapping him comfortingly on the shoulder as they strolled out.

"Tell me what your class was like after school, 'kay?" Ino hollered as she walked down to the gym for her P.E. class. Naruto stared after her, an eyebrow raised as he emptied his lunch into a trash bin.

He got what she meant after he headed to his locker and popped it open to retrieve his next period's books – realizing with the kind of horrified expression one gets after seeing a parent naked, that his sixth period today was...

Physics. With Neji.

"_Shit_."

- - - - »

Neji stood at the front of his classroom, surveying sleepy-looking students occupying the rows of desks before him. He proceeded to take roll once the bell tolled again, keeping his eyes dutifully glued to the clipboard.

"Aburame Shino."

Shino raised his hand.

"Aoi Nuzaki."

"Present!"

He continued this until he reached the bottom of the list, raising an eyebrow as he read the last name off: "Uzumaki Naruto."

For the first few minutes, no one said anything. Neji grimaced and pressed his pen to the clipboard, checking the name off the list – until a student in the back row finally raised his hand, dropping the printed folder he was holding so a sheepish grin was visible to the rest of the class.

"Er – I'm here," Naruto confirmed, eyes purposefully avoiding Neji's lilac ones. Several students laughed as they turned to look at him, but others remained silent, fearing punishment from the Hyuuga if they were to offend him (he appeared to be just like Sasuke, if not worse).

"Speak up next time," Neji said, his voice possessing the slightest edge of irritation in it. Naruto frowned from where he sat, looking up to send several glares in the Hyuuga's direction once he had turned away.

"My name is Hyuuga Neji, and I am going to be your Physics teacher for the remainder of this year." Neji started, pacing back and forth at a leisurely pace. In the front row, Naruto spotted several girls fidgeting with their hair or nails, their faces a brilliant glow of red. If Neji noticed them, he ignored it.

"What happened to Kankuro-sensei, then?" someone asked, not bothering to raise his hand before doing so. Neji looked ready to reprimand him, but thinking better of it, he stopped.

"He's visiting his family in Sunakagure – I believe it's because his sister has fallen dangerously ill." he explained.

There was a moment of thoughtful silence, accompanied by several disappointed "Aw!"s once realization sunk in.

"Are we going to continue with our previous lesson plan even while Kankuro-sensei's gone?" another girl asked, looking eager to start the lesson. She hadn't bothered to raise her hand either – this made Neji worry about the kind of etiquette Kankuro had enforced in his classroom prior to his leave.

"Yes, we are," Neji supplied, moving to board to write his name down. "So without further ado – open your textbooks to chapter eight, and we can begin."

- - - - »

Roughly fifty-six minutes later, the dismissing bell rang, and students crammed against one another as they fled out the door. Neji's harsh lecture and demand for attention when he caught students' eyes sporting a glassy sheen (signifying that one was in the process of daydreaming) had scared the majority of the class.

Naruto, amongst those desperate to leave once the opportunity was presented, found himself annoyed to no end when Neji called him back.

"Can't we talk tomorrow, sensei? I have... soccer practice to go to," Naruto begged. The slight quirk of his eyebrow made it obvious that Neji hadn't bought his excuse.

"I recall reading in the student handbook that academics held higher priority than athletics. Your coach can wait."

"...Fine." Naruto sighed, slipping into a desk. He made an effort to not meet Neji's eyes as the teacher stood from his own desk, walking to the whiteboard to survey the equations he'd previously written on it. He remained like that for a while – his back facing Naruto, eyes an unfocused shade of lilac as he recollected himself.

"I'm engaged," Neji said once the silence between the two became unbearable. Naruto's eyes widened, as he had been expecting something other than an engagement announcement when Neji called him back to talk. Neji continued to scan the board, oblivious to the unprecedented thoughts running throughout Naruto's mind. He coughed before he spoke again.

"The wedding is this summer. My uncle arranged it all."

Unable to help himself, Naruto sat upright in slight protest. "What's her name?" he asked, his voice neither challenging nor overly congratulating.

"Hinata," Neji replied. Naruto blinked in recognition upon hearing the name – he'd heard it once before, back when Neji taught him in middle school.

_Aren't you too young to be married?_ Naruto planned on asking. He kept the question to himself as he recalled the immediate answer: it was not Neji's decision to make, but Hiashi Hyuuga's. It sickened him to know that he could remember so much about his middle school teacher.

"Why are you telling me this?" Naruto questioned. Neji didn't respond as quickly as Naruto would have liked, instead taking the time to erase stray marks on the whiteboard. When he was finished, he turned to stare at Naruto with his piercing lilac eyes.

"Because this time," Neji answered, his voice smooth and collected, "I plan on keeping our relationship strictly professional."

- - - - »

**End Note:**  
I can't seem to get past this High School AU stage of my penmanship. It's sort of bothersome, but it's helping me write better in some way or another. ...I think. ;)

Oh, and I'm sorry about the utter lack of Sasuke in this chapter – there was no place to really fit him in. The next chapter will have his response to the new teacher on the staff. Hehe.


End file.
